Trading Buckets Lists for Something Else

A Recipe for Creating a Life to Love

Hello Friends! I stepped away from my writing desk for most of the month of August (though it’s still August, let’s note that!). It felt right even though I had announced a summer series, a twist on happy hour. One of my main focuses these past months has been to lean into joy and peace as medicine and inspiration. I have to say it worked. I have been feeling great. It hasn’t been the “bypass everything'“ path to this feeling. It’s the result of feeling it all and leaning into positivity anyway. I simply had to as things were weighing on me heavily. (To add to that some beloved forests near my home are burning on a huge scale and these ones don’t make the news cycle. Let’s pray for them to end soon. (Grateful smoke has cleared after a thick haze for days)

What I can tell you from what I experienced is that I did not land in some faraway paradise of perfection. I can say while I had lots to share I recognized I was in an ebb (compared to flow) and needed to chill and take care of some things I had ignored while I made space for taking care of my well being. It was the height of summer and the energy pointed to aliveness at the same time my body mind spirit called for peace and surrender. I had been in a highly creative period with a lot of energy and joy was a welcome companion. Aha now it’s time for some peace I felt within. My partner and I had been on an incredible adventure in July and the need for integration was clear.

What about my readers?! Was a thought that came up. As subscriptions to read stacked up in my own inbox I wondered if you too were experiencing an overload of things to read and needed a moment to catch up. Especially on a device. I longed for the feeling of paper in my hands without a backlight and leaned into reading books. I did attempt to write a few times and felt the whispers say “it’s ok they’ve got plenty to read and explore”. So I listened. I still wrote as way to harness what was flowing through. Plus with fans going nonstop in a heat wave the ability to record somewhat decent audio was an arduous task.

One reason I had decided to share drink recipes was part of my own wellness strategy to drink more water. To also make it a bit more fun and delight my senses, and hopefully yours too by sharing these. Lately I have been exploring my own version of a bucket list. Creating a recipe book or blog have always been on my list of things I’d love to do. Yet the list is long! Can you relate?

At one point I even made lists for different decades in my life. Not that I always follow all of my own plans. Also my old lists were filled with epic big life things. Why was it all so intense?! As an antidote to go big or go home, I pondered the small things that actually made regular life awesome. Not just highlights, the low lights that bring those inner smiles on rainy days. Little shifts that makes an entire life worth living and not a stack of rulers to push against and end up feeling unworthy of a memorable existence. All the days can’t be iconic!

Yes I have typically held my own bar of expectations up fairly high, like blue sky high. From this I felt like I was in an endless game of judgement or reward. To let go of heightened criticism, to relax into joy and peace, I had to let this go. To soften my own approach to myself and my goals. While I do enjoy philosophical target practise, I also enjoy the #artofrelaxation and to actually embrace this dynamic balance it was time to really truly surrender the lists and the endless waves of to-dos and self assigned assignments. I’m not just relaxing the ruler I’ve decided on a new way to live.

This year I had many small yearnings arise as I mused personal and professional goals, as well as what really called out to my soul and spirit. Spend time lingering in a hammock with a book and a great view jumped out of me onto the page. Feel more connected to the foods I am eating and my body. Daily movement to feel wonderful and cultivate this deep connection. Healthier creative cooking and expanding my idea of creative living. Spend deep time with flowers and the local waters. I really just wanted to swim swim swim. And paddle. Paddle paddle paddle.

Write books (this is happening!!). Submit articles to magazines, etc (done yet ongoing). Paint - for fun. Create without goals. Explore & Discover. Be my own best friend. Expand my definition of intimacy. Start sewing again, just for fun. Read books. Savour reflections without the analysis. Many of these are behavior or mindset adjustments. (PS cold plunges on hot days do a lot for attitude tune-ups!). Some of these are new habits and none of it is about pressure. I spent a lot of my life living under my own pressure - believing it created diamonds. There are other ways to sparkle!

If we choose to live a life only aiming for the big things we will miss out on some of the tiniest most enchanting moments where we can freely and finally breathe.

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This list is not really a bucket list. It is really a:

Recipe for Creating a Life to Love List

It’s really not a list at all, but a surmising of things to do to feel alive and well. In love with myself and my life. Not the honeymoon part or good vibes only, but all of it.

This is in process and unique to me.

I am curious what is your recipe?

Trial and error is a process not a game.

Why not keep it fun and not about the gains.

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Here’s a limerick I wrote about bucket lists during that global thing that kept everyone inside:

There once was a girl far from Nantucket

She wondered and pondered until she said fuck it

She had too many to do’s

And just as many boo boos

Finally, she threw her list in a bucket.

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If you make any lists for yourself make it about LOVE.

We are all one, but this is your life!

With Love & Inspiration,

Nichola

*Note: There may be typos and grammatical errors. This is because I often hit send before I’ve re-read it enough times to notice. I write from the heart and publish before I edit out my natural voice. I see mistakes when I receive it like a reader and edit some after. I have chosen to leave some that are part of my quirky style, so it is authentic. As long as it’s my truth and not hurtful in a direction mean way I’m cool with it. I don’t have a physical team checking my work or anything, Just me at my desk, with an iphone of art, photos and a recording app, and of course you in my head and heart.